So this wasn’t the post I was going to put out today, but I have to write about this because if I don’t I have nowhere else to put these thoughts out there, and I just feel I need to speak them out loud to somebody. And whether 99.9% of people reading this don’t get it, it’s about the 0.01% that will understand.
Today I watched the film ‘A Star is Born’. I admittedly watched it not expecting a lot, other than a bit of eye candy in Bradley Cooper and what I thought was going to be a predictable easy watching story. Just the kind of films I love; not too much thinking! If you haven’t watched the film I won’t ruin the storyline. And if you have, you may even read what I’ve got to say and wonder which bit of the film I’m even talking about. But I just have to put out there that I don’t think I’ve ever watched a film that has impacted me so deeply. And the reason it’s affected me is very personal to something I thought I was dealing with well and was more or less over. But seeing it played out in front of me just made me cry; and cry uncontrollably at that! I felt I had my tears under control in the cinema and I’d hidden them well in the darkness. But I’ve just walked around a shopping centre afterwards and gone for a meal and repeatedly just welled up.
And the message that hit me like a tonne of bricks was that we never know what someone is going through fully. That the words that we say to someone can impact them beyond anything we could possibly comprehend. That when somebody is trying their best just to make it through each day we can have our own agenda and totally kick that person for our own gains, with no regard for the outcome. And some scenes in this film just really highlighted that to me. I resonated completely with them, knowing that I too have battled and battled with depression and then someone has just done or said something from a completely narcissistic point of view and set me back years, not knowing or even caring for the impact they have had on me or my ability to then care for my little family. I was reminded of myself and knowing my intentions to just be happy and make other people happy, and how someone can completely knock that out of a person. And what an absolutely disgusting act that is, to purposely intend to kill someone’s spirit. And perhaps the scenes that upset me in this film allowed me to release something I’ve needed to cry out for so long. My husband certainly thinks I’ve lost the plot right now as he left the film saying, “Let’s watch something with a bit more action next time!” unaware of me making my excuses to go to the toilet where I could sob in peace.
So for all those out there that would also watch this film and cry for the people in this world being knocked day in day out, that are bullied and tormented but keep fighting and fighting to keep going; maybe you’ll get it. Maybe you’ll get it a little bit, or maybe you’ll get it a whole lot! Maybe some will watch this film and get to the end without even knowing which scenes affected me so deeply. I think a lot of people will resonate with this film for a whole host of different reasons though. But although this post is far from an advertisement in happiness, it is meant as a reminder that there is hope. There are people out there, myself included, praying for all those people fighting demons. And from a purely grateful angle I thank God to be on the right side of wanting to help and uplift people fighting with everything in their body just to get through each day. If you’re one of those people please keep fighting, because you are loved. And if you don’t feel very loved right now then there will come a day when you will feel it again! We haven’t met everybody we’re going to meet in our lives, and we haven’t experienced everything we’re going to experience, and tomorrow could be the meeting or start of something completely life changing. So please, PLEASE keep fighting for your happiness.